dicey | ☣ 004

Man, this place is just turning into Troll City lately! What with weirdo future Karkat having been stuck here for perigees, meeeeeeee coming in just before that whole place flooded, and our poor, misguided, confused, obviously brain-damaged Tavros showing up just a few days ago.

Okay, so maybe three isn't really a lot, but it's one fourth of our entire species these days so shut up.

Aaaaaaaanyway, you all should probably ignore those losers. No, you definitely should! Especially if they type in brown and don't make much sense and talk shit about me. They don't know anything about anything.

But enough about them! What the fuck is going on with everyone else? You all are acting like total idiots and while it's actually pretty hilarious to watch, I don't really get it, haha. Explain!

[OOC: This post is audio because I figure not everyone wants her courier crap showing up on their flist, but anyone that's told me here that they don't mind her typing quirk will be getting her hiding behind text. If you reply to this and don't mind text responses, please let me know via that link! ♥]

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[She listens very carefully. Much of it does not make sense to her, but there are parts that she understands, she thinks.]

You and Tavros are destined for one another, but you fear he is not worthy of your affection?

Forgive me, Marquise, you will have to explain some of your words, as when we discussed time previously. What are "caliginous" and "kismesis"? And I know not what a "flushed quadrant" may be.

[Although she's been here long enough that she thinks it might be a euphemism of some sort.]

It can be very confusing, especially when betrothals are involved. I was to marry a man my father chose for me, but whom I did not love. I was fortunate, however, to marry a man more worthy by far, and whom I love as ardently as he loves me.

[And cue dreamy smile from thoughts of Romeo.]

You don't have quadrants? That's so weird!

Uh, I'm not Karkat the Romance Expert or anything, but I guess I can try to explain this shit. Trolls have four quadrants. Two are concupiscent, which means mating stuff when we get older. Then there's red romance, which is for positive feelings like pity, and black romance, which is for negative feelings like hate. Tavros is supposed to be my matesprit, which is positive red romance, but I thiiiiiiiink my feelings for him are more black. But I don't really know!

[She pays careful attention, even though to her reckoning, it is most odd.]

If I have the right of it, because you and Tavros are destined for one another, you feel you should have romantic inclinations towards him, but you are uncertain as to whether or not you do, because his behavior is not what would be considered attractive and ideal for you. Has he had a chance to prove himself in your eyes? Has he courted at all? Even children may court, in their way, may show their feelings of affection toward one another.

[She's not touching the 'mating' part, because she has no experience in it at all, and one does not discuss such things with children, regardless.]

It's romantic either way! I just don't know if it's the right kind. And he's had soooooooo many chances, but he's ruined all of them!

[Troll romance is most confusing. Still, she is going to give it her best. Cheerful as she is this week, on top of her usual love of all things romantic, she can't not.]

And, these ruined chances make you think your feelings are more of the black romance of which you spoke? What could he do that would redeem him in your eyes, and do you wish him redeemed in such a fashion? If you do not wish his courtship, then he must of course leave off of it, regardless of your destined betrothal. If you do not love him in the way you feel you should, it is better to wait until you find someone whom you do love fully and without reservation.

He's not doing any of that courtship shit; that's part of the problem!

He could be stronger, or at least let me help make him stronger. But he just resists and resists and resiiiiiiiists.

[Ah. Now, she thinks she begins to see.]

Perhaps he worries that he will not be worthy of courting you if you are the one to help him become stronger. Men, at least human men, are often sensitive to such things. He may worry that he is not strong enough to protect you and be by your side, but that if he relies upon you for such aid, it only further proves his weakness. Cannot your friend Karkat, whom you have said is a great expert in romance, aid him to become worthy of your affections? He may take to that more readily.

He's so stubborn, he won't even let me help. He just says he doesn't like my way and then does more dumb shit.

He's just so WEAK, and he won't even try to get better. That's what makes me the angriest! He tries to make me into the bad guy when I'm really on his side!

Men are very strange creatures, sometimes. They perceive that to rely on a woman makes them weak, when nothing could be farther from the truth. We ladies are the foundation for their strength. But they are sometimes foolish and do not understand right away about such things. Often, other men must explain it to them, or we must make them understand in subtle ways, that they do not realize until they have given themselves over to our care how we have helped them.

[This is said with the greatest affection and sincerity.]

I guess. It's still fucking annoying how clueless and ungrateful he is. And the "future" one here is even worse.

[...]

So uh. You can call me Vriska if you want.

[congrats Juliet, you get to be the first person she tells her real name to]

I take it he has not improved in character, then.

[It's meant to sound slightly sarcastic. Truly, it is. But the event makes the words sound far more pleasant than she intends them to sound.]

Perhaps here, with time and patience, he will see fit to improve.

[And then, she blinks. Vriska is not a name the Marquise has ever told to her before. She smiles warmly. Clearly, it must be a given name, not part of her official title, and, like many of the nobility, she must hold it in reserve. She curtsies.]

As you like, Vriska. I am honored.

Just don't spread it around.

Again, as you like. I shall continue to use your title in public, Vriska.

Sweet!

☣ 004 | audio

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